Yesterday I received a “priority overnight” FedEx package from my mother. Printed on the envelope were the words “Extremely Urgent”:
What could it be? I wondered. Important documents that required my signature? Something scary, like a will? Or, perhaps I’d never actually paid that parking ticket I got 9 years ago while borrowing my mother’s car, and it was coming back to haunt me with a vengeance?
Turns out, it was none of the above. Inside were two pairs of lace underwear.
As a Twitter follower (and reader of this blog) put it: “Either you told her your laundry got eaten by a washer, or your mom has a wicked sense of humor.”
It’s definitely not the former, and I doubt it’s the latter—her sense of humor isn’t that intentional. In reality, she was probably underwear shopping for herself and decided to get something for me while she was at it. Then, she sent it from work, where the only FedEx envelopes they have are the ones designed to arrive the next day.
That, or she’s hinting not-so-subtly at the fact that I’m running out of time to get married and produce grandchildren.
5 responses so far ↓
1 boo // Apr 25, 2009 at 6:23 pm
I really am laughing out loud now. It is something my mother might also do if those envelops were around. Even as a hint though, it’s a damned funny one.
2 michael5000 // Apr 27, 2009 at 3:33 pm
Nothing says “Marry Me!” like lacy underwear….
3 MB! // Apr 28, 2009 at 6:29 am
apparently it gets worse after you marry. My sister received a lace teddy from her mother-in-law. Not only that, but it was waiting for them on her pillow when they came to visit for a weekend! Sketchy.
Looking forward to seeing you this summer. MB
4 Sasha // Apr 28, 2009 at 10:27 am
Your humor is both intentional and fantastic. I love it!
5 malahat sunset // May 5, 2009 at 7:02 am
Did you ask your mom why she sent you lace underwear? If so, I’d love to hear the reason. It seems like you should get a head’s up before you receive a parcel like that. Or did she expect you to know the reason for them? Anyway, that was funny.
By the way, where’s the photo of you and Calla you were going to email me?