Everything’s fine. I appreciate everyone’s concern, thoughts, best wishes, positive vibes, etc. My mother, naturally, was on the phone with her office just hours after her surgery to discuss matters of life-threatening urgency, like, you know, how much her organization should spend on office supplies in the upcoming year. She told me that she’s just glad it’s over, but that she’s annoyed that she had to go to Pittsburgh to have it done—if she had done it in New York, she would only have had to take one day off of work instead of four.
She went to Pittsburgh because the gamma knife has been around those parts for twenty-odd years. In New York—and I’m sure this came as a shock to my mother, whose belief that there is no other place worth living is unwaivering—it is a relatively new technology and the doctors there aren’t as practiced as those in Pittsburgh.
We will know in six months if the radiation killed the tumor—apparently this is likely, as the gamma knife has a 92% success rate. The scary part is that even if the tumor dies, side effects are possible (although very rare), and can manifest any time within 3-20 months. Possible side effects are chronic headaches, vision problems, difficulty thinking, blindness or stroke.
In the past week I’ve received phone calls and emails from blog-reading relatives and family friends wondering how my mother is doing and why on Earth she hadn’t told them about this. The first question I can answer, the second, not so much. My mother has a bad habit of keeping important things to herself—I didn’t even know this whole gamma knife thing was happening until Thanksgiving, and that’s only because an aunt brought it up.
It’s not like she’s trying to be secretive, it’s just that what most normal people consider to be “important things” take a back burner to my mother’s list of priorities. And it’s not like she’s not worried about the actual important things, she just doesn’t seem to want to talk about them.
Besides, isn’t the dilemma of what to wear to the company holiday party the most pressing issue of our time?
15 responses so far ↓
1 TimsHead // Jan 17, 2007 at 7:30 pm
Look at it this way: Many Baby Boomer guys risk those side effects on a regular basis to take pills for longer erections. Hmm. That sounded less crude in my head.
Sure, I finally find the time to ryc, and then you post a new entry, But hey, seriously, glad she seems to be doing well … and it’s always good to read an (always well-written) update from you!
2 Gabriel // Jan 17, 2007 at 10:43 pm
A heart full of *heart*, prayers, wishes and Positive Vibes for your mom, you and your family.
Gabe
3 jiffer // Jan 18, 2007 at 4:21 am
Laura,
clearly this runs in the family. we are told things after the decision is made, not before. the important things are not up for dicussion or debate.
my parents do this. i remember when grampa keane died. i did not even know he was in the hospital. i only found out because my dad was out of town and joyce could not reach my mom in the middle of the night (she was at work.) joyce called me to get my mom’s work number, and she told me what was going on.
a second example, my mom had a lump removed from her breast and told me two days before. granted my dad went with her, but somehow we think we should know and be told.
the worst part of it all is that i am finding that i am just as guilty as my parents…
watch yourself, we are not as different from our parents as we would like to think.
love
jiffer
4 James Cooper // Jan 18, 2007 at 8:46 am
For whatever encouragement it may provide this person’s father just underwent the Gamma Knife procedure on a brain tumor and it appears to have been highly successful. He’s still contending with lung cancer, which is where it started, but the brain tumor seems to have been dealt with.
5 Aunt Mary // Jan 18, 2007 at 1:17 pm
I really think its a gene thing… something like the “procrastination gene’ you & I inherited from poppa Keane
6 jiffer // Jan 18, 2007 at 2:19 pm
i have that one too
7 mydogischelsea // Jan 18, 2007 at 2:24 pm
And here I was thinking I had a mutated gene that caused me to waste time superfluously.
8 Boo // Jan 18, 2007 at 5:24 pm
Here’s to a six month free and clear. That’s party worthy. I can see your frustration with not knowing.
My family is the exact opposite. I hear of every tiny detail from serious to hypochondriac like (I don’t know the adjective for it). It tends to dull the worry but increase the irritation with the narratives. Then I feel guilty because sometimes it’s serious. I almost want to give them a Likert scale and have them rate their woes according to what is most dire so I know what to worry about.
One of them has treated a stubbed toe with more drama than she treated her out patient surgery. Oh, but I heard about both in graphic and repeated detail.
I don’t think I’d trade, but you know.
9 Anahita // Jan 18, 2007 at 6:24 pm
You know, reading the comments other xangans leave for you is almost as fun as reading your posts…close
I’m glad to hear your Mom’s okay and I’m sorry you have to struggle with uncertainty. That’s really funny about your Mom and her opinion of New York :p Can’t blame her, though. As for the most pressing issue of our time: how about a red dress?
10 Kaz // Jan 19, 2007 at 10:58 am
Hugs all around.
11 thinlizzy // Jan 21, 2007 at 8:31 am
I’ve got my fingers crossed for a clean 6 months.
12 Gary Piche' // Jan 21, 2007 at 5:32 pm
Hey you gotta be stylin!
13 Erika // Jan 22, 2007 at 9:50 am
Your mother is amazing, I really don’t know how she does it. Left you a message a few days back but I guess you’re keeping yourself occupied and far away. Can’t believe we didn’t see each other over break, or ever or ever. Please let me know how everyone is doing?
14 Lynn // Jan 22, 2007 at 8:49 pm
Glad she’s doing better. Yes, I know that attitude of New Yorkers. It’s unfortunate, but there is a whole rest of the country out here populated by some really smart people.
RYC: Yay! You got it. If you read it and love it, do a review on Amazon. I’m getting great comments from people, but no one’s reviewing. And my rating has now hit an alltime low. Time for some promotional stuff. Ack!
Lynn
15 mary // Jan 23, 2007 at 6:20 am
I have my gamma knife done in New York City in 1997. I looked on the IRSA website http://www.irsa.org and found there are eight centers in New York State. Maybe Pittsburgh did not tell her everything.
Sorry she had to go so far. I love your dog chelsea. I have two springers and have always raised them. They are wonderful. Take good care.