The best part of my mother’s sense of humor is that she has no idea when she’s being funny. She’s at her most hilarious when she’s just talking, when things like “Oh, I can only have vodka — I’m on a di-di” come out of her mouth as if they are the most normal sentences in the world.Most recent example:
A bunch of us were sitting around the lunch table talking [Yes, I work in my mother's office]. Someone announced that the Pope has just died. Conversation veered from some boring work-related topic to things like this:
“Oh, that’s so sad.”
“He lived a long, good life.”
“At least he died peacefully, the way he wanted to.”
“He was a good man, he’ll go to a good place.” There is some nodding and agreeing, and then a moment of silence.
Then my mother chimes in, rather loudly:
“I never really liked him very much.”
Leave it to her to be tactful. The next thing out of her mouth was: “So… should I get a facial today?”
16 responses so far ↓
1 BouncingIntoGraceland // Apr 1, 2005 at 8:35 am
i used the elaine voice yesterday and….”i’m on a di-di…” in conversation.
it got quite a few lughs… but i hope it’s alright with you… (you were fully credited and highly reccomended).
2 admirably_abnormal // Apr 1, 2005 at 8:47 am
I always used to abhor my mothers non sequiturs. It used to embarrass me to no end how silly she was. But now I see it as a fun way to live life. Not all bogged down by rules and standards. It’s almost like living life as a child, before you learn what you “should” say, and instead say exactly what pops into your head. Staying forever young sounds good to me. I’m glad it’s in my genes =o)
3 pumpernickel_rye // Apr 1, 2005 at 9:47 am
Laughing out loud. Your mother would make a great sitcom.
I am fully recovered from my full-blown Easter tilt into drunken abandon, thank you. I’m so ashamed…. But then again, it’s Friday. Isn’t that the day we do the wine again?
4 Jay_galk25 // Apr 1, 2005 at 12:28 pm
HAHAHA! I said something a little different and I bothered my mom and Anthony, or as Anthony said “Your so going to Hell, I mean just call yourself Satan and get yourself a throne.”
Jay “Rawr”
5 CandyDishDoom // Apr 1, 2005 at 12:49 pm
Hee hee.
What’s a ‘di-di’?
6 chublin // Apr 1, 2005 at 1:15 pm
i appreciate mildly oblivious people.
7 Jules27 // Apr 1, 2005 at 1:25 pm
Someone announced he was dead? Come on people, wait for him to breathe his last! And sounds like you could most definitely sell a sitcom pilot including your mother.
8 Magazineman // Apr 1, 2005 at 2:54 pm
Well, at least she didn’t say, “The Pope? I didn’t know he was going to die-die…”
9 aropeofsand // Apr 1, 2005 at 3:33 pm
Thank you so much! I love to hear that!
10 TimsHead // Apr 2, 2005 at 3:46 am
Sounds like your mom has a bit of Edith Bunker in her, in a good way. I have friends who aren’t very good at censoring thoughts between their brain and their mouth, and they make things fun.As to your question about the car that runs on vegetable oil, it actually emitted a vague aroma of chicken lo mein. Which made me crave Chinese food. But then it doesn’t take much to make me crave Chinese food.
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12 McCrakin_Phil // Apr 2, 2005 at 5:08 am
thats great… it was a shocker wasnt it… the Pope is dead… oh wait he’s not April fools!!!
13 DavisMcDavis // Apr 4, 2005 at 6:00 am
Women sure are stupid!
14 MaximaBella // Apr 4, 2005 at 2:41 pm
oooh I love it!
15 tektoo2 // Apr 5, 2005 at 7:08 am
Wow, way to be blunt…
16 Anatole69 // Apr 5, 2005 at 3:59 pm
The old foot in mouth disease. Meh, parents… what can you do?Take care.