Last night, as I was walking my dog in the rain, a small, Post-It sized swatch of saffron caught my eye. I stopped and did a double take. Sure enough, lying in a tiny puddle on the street, was a little piece of The Gates!
I thought, at first, that this was fate — that somehow, a perfectly square piece of The Gates had become dislodged from the installation and flown up over the buildings to land serendipitously in the puddle in front of me, like that feather in Forrest Gump, or that flying plastic bag in that movie about the smart kid, or like Mary Poppins in the movie Mary Poppins, or like… oh well, you get the picture.
But then I remembered that The Gates workers had been handing out pieces of saffron cloths on a first-come-first-serve basis. Relieved that this was no act of vandalism, but somewhat dismayed that my piece was not one-of-a-kind, I stuffed the orange square in my pocket, happy for the surprise nonetheless.
It wasn’t until I arrived back at home and inspected my little piece of The Gates more closely: it was indeed a miracle! Finally, my time to make a fortune by selling an inanimate object with the visage of a biblical figure has come! See for yourself. I put it on top of my keyboard so you can get a sense of scale:
eBay, here I come!
[Note: If the above image of the Virgin Mary looks strikingly similar to the image of the Virgin Mary I found on my Pop-Tart, it is wholly a (holy) coincidence.]
Edit: Special thanks to Terra and Solomon for pointing out that the movie about the smart kid is Good Will Hunting and the movie about the plastic bag is American Beauty.
18 responses so far ↓
1 tektoo2 // Feb 23, 2005 at 4:32 pm
What is the name of that movie with the plastic bag? Its going to kill me thinking about it. You’ll be a millionaire by midnight.
2 SunflowerFiesta // Feb 23, 2005 at 4:42 pm
I was thinking of putting some stuff on eBay. Maybe all the crap my step monster tried to bribe me with over the years to keep my mouth shut about his activities. Probably not as popular as the Virgin Mary, though.
3 prettypixie7 // Feb 23, 2005 at 5:19 pm
You are truly blessed. Go forth and spread the good news…for the Virgin has appeared to you in saffron-colored cloth, a sure sign of the apocalypse.
4 prettypixie7 // Feb 23, 2005 at 5:28 pm
I never did tell you…it was breast cancer.
5 chicagoartgirl23 // Feb 23, 2005 at 5:42 pm
Oh the gates! I was sucked into a mindnumbingly pleasant episode of Everwood on Monday night (I admit it–I like what is “Fresh on the WB!”) and The Gates were a very orange and very proud peice of the New York backdrop. ::grin::
6 xrottingfromwithinx // Feb 23, 2005 at 9:05 pm
Comment: The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou. Blessed is thy fruit.
Commentary: I stumbled across your xanga without intent. (Chalk one up for the noble tradition of procrastination.) Finding your writing both witty and insightful, I took the necessary action to ensure that one day in the not-to-distant future it might again aid me in my quest to delay any necessary academic writing. Hence this post.
7 Zaida_the_Turtle_Lady // Feb 23, 2005 at 10:03 pm
lol
How did you resist eating the Virgin Mary Pop-Tart? Pop-Tarts are irresistible, sacred or not!
8 McCrakin_Phil // Feb 23, 2005 at 11:24 pm
Wow, that was beautiful. Ma’am whenever i need to read something amazing i know i can just head str8 to ur xanga. Thank you
9 Jay_galk25 // Feb 23, 2005 at 11:59 pm
Jesus loves you, but so do I, hmm…deathmatch? :).
Jay “Rawr”
10 Mensonges // Feb 24, 2005 at 3:42 am
Haha, you seem to come by alot of miracles.
11 sunshineboy78 // Feb 24, 2005 at 4:02 am
You maddening miracle monger! Don’t you see? The Virgin is speaking to us all! She’s telling us to Express ourselves! To get into the groove and cherish the rays of light in our lives. You don’t need pop tarts for her messages. Yea verrily is she available at her megastore for only 14.95 plus tax.
12 trcs // Feb 24, 2005 at 7:36 am
movie with the floating plastic bag - American Beauty? Trying to remember where the smart kid comes in though… only thought of a completely different movie, Good Will Hunting. And re: your previous comment - my journals were pretty much the same thing. “I love Richard” “I love Randy” “If Richard gets another study hall he’ll get suspended. If he does, I WILL DIE!!!” haha.How is your week unfolding in nyc? Is the sun shining like it is here?
13 Jay_galk25 // Feb 24, 2005 at 9:25 am
I could care less how many people come to it, liked the track cause it allowed me to see people who didn’t comment, figure if they were worth talking to :). Since, it’s probably not coming back I pretty much over the issue now and just gonna go back to searching and branching off others :). Damn, you should have laughed at work, share the hysteria and brilliance that is me with the world!
Jay “Rawr”
Btw Jesus is winning atm, he knew my weakness, a barrel of fish, stale ass bread, and of course enough wine to sink a small fleet…bastard!
14 MaximaBella // Feb 24, 2005 at 1:00 pm
great writings here…found my way thru Jay’s site…
Love your procrastination list….
I so identify! What do you think my xanga is for? I could literally ‘find’ something to do on my computer all day long, only getting up to pee, while a mass of unfolded laundry, dirty dishes, and empy cat foof bowl surrounds me!
15 Gnarlysurf // Feb 24, 2005 at 4:50 pm
I do not know the mysterious behavoir of the google search machine. Try again and let me know. I remember you telling me that youre name came up under my site but now as you say there’s nothing. Hmmmmm…
16 Beautiful_Sandstorm // Feb 25, 2005 at 10:31 am
Hey, Thanks. I know… We broke up. SO whatever. *smile* I’m cool with it.
17 doctorperky // Feb 26, 2005 at 4:53 am
“The movie about the plastic bag.” That’s funny. Appropriate though. I never thought it was as good as it thought it was.I found somebody’s old grocery list in a puddle the other day. I don’t think I’ll blog about it though. Maybe if it had been saffron.
18 Gnarlysurf // Feb 26, 2005 at 5:29 am
Yes I am aware that your site still does not pop up with mine. Hmmm perhaps I should email those google dudes and see whats the deal.